Actually, I would invest in a bunch of kitchen implements, so that never again would I be able to use the excuse "How can I learn to cook that if I don't have a casserole dish!?"
And then I'd spend the leftover money from the casserole dish on just blow. Well, maybe a few hookers.
I'd buy a case of Gentleman Jack. Or maybe two cases. Then I would go on a three week binge. Then I would use some of the remaining money to buy a new liver. Then I would buy a case of Jim Beam and continue the binge until that liver gave out.
Also, I would buy a manual typewriter, and during my binge I would write poetry. When I eventually died midway through the Jim Beam binge, I would request that Nick Lachey sing my poetry, in its entirety, at my funeral. And you would all listen and weep at its beauty and blush at its foul language.
Yep. Otherwise, I guess we would all answer "pay off our loans" and that would be no fun.
ReplyDeleteIn no particular order...hookers and blow.
ReplyDeleteActually, I would invest in a bunch of kitchen implements, so that never again would I be able to use the excuse "How can I learn to cook that if I don't have a casserole dish!?"
And then I'd spend the leftover money from the casserole dish on just blow. Well, maybe a few hookers.
I would buy a $10,000 pair of sunglasses... it would be totally worth it.
ReplyDeleteI'd buy a case of Gentleman Jack. Or maybe two cases. Then I would go on a three week binge. Then I would use some of the remaining money to buy a new liver. Then I would buy a case of Jim Beam and continue the binge until that liver gave out.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I would buy a manual typewriter, and during my binge I would write poetry. When I eventually died midway through the Jim Beam binge, I would request that Nick Lachey sing my poetry, in its entirety, at my funeral. And you would all listen and weep at its beauty and blush at its foul language.
I WOULD DONATE SOME TO MY CHURCH AND THE REST I WOULD TAKE A VERY NICE, LONG CRUISE..
ReplyDelete